Long Distance Lover
by Ladama Of The Scale
Summary: What if Sasuke could repopulate the Uchiha district? How far would he go? Would he even keep his brother alive, just for his children? And what does Naruto has to do with any of this?
1. Chapter 1

Long Distance Lovers

Summary: What if Sasuke could repopulate the uchiha district? How far would he go? Would he even keep his brother alive, just for his children? And what dose Naruto has to do with any of this?

Warning: Yaoi, M-preg, rape, all out insanity

'thinking'

"talking"

"_Lyrics"_

'**Biju talking'**

Ladama: Now you've done it…

Katsuki: He's not my brother in this fic?!

Isabella: God have mercy on your soul…

Tati: AKA run.

Gulp

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The mission was simple. Escort the Princess of snow to the land of the waves. Simple, Ne? I wish. Sakura looked thoughtfully at Naruto. He may have looked happy, but the blond gave off an aura not to different from that of a kicked puppy. Tsunade warned me. When she briefed us, she warned me of his mental condition. I bet you think it's something serious, right? No, just a bad case of flashback…

Tsunade looked at the group as she explained the mission. Sakura kept sending worried glances to the obviously depressed blond. Kakashi just wanted to make sure he heard right, and Naruto, well he was half asleep listening to rock n roll. Even though he had the best hearing in the building, he had it up enough for everyone else to clearly hear the lyrics.

"_I know how your halo fell,_

_I saw you bid your heart farewell…"_

Tsunade gave him a look before beginning. "The princess of snow has some important business in the land of the waves. She only wanted team 7 to take the mission. She doesn't know what happened to Sasuke. Don't tell her unless she asks." Naruto visibly recoiled at the name _Sasuke_. 'So he is listening.' "You will meet her outside the gate." "What about the ninja from snow?" Tsunade looked at Kakashi, "They brought her here, but they can't deal with the climate. None of their jutsus like the temperature." He nodded. "Sakura come here." She walked forward. "Yes?" Wise copper met worried emerald, "Tomorrow is his birthday, the kyuubi festival and the anniversary of Sasuke's leaving. All the things he hates. So this is just his way of crawling into his shell. Be careful of what you say, and what he hears. Naruto is very sensitive right now." "Sensitive? About the coolest festival of the year? Why?" Tsunade looked like Sakura had just grown another fore head. (Or maybe an arm) "You really don't know?" She shook her head. Tsunade looked at the easiest way to explain, she found her answer in a book. In the book it showed that the Kyuubi was sealed away into a human container. It had a picture of the seal used to keep it there. "I've seen that seal somewhere..." Tsunade cooed to the asleep Naruto, "Naruto, honey, please lift your shirt and bend some light to my desk." He opened an amethyst eye (Kyuubi's chakra was trying to lull him to sleep), and followed the order. To Sakura's surprise, a spiraling black seal showed itself on his stomach. "You know, you could have just as easily said, 'Naruto, Show Tsunade-baba your seal.'" She huffed mumbling something along the lines of, "You're pushing it, Gaki." The Hokage looked to Sakura and said something, but her student wasn't listening. 'Naruto has the kyuubi inside him? He must have been ridiculed and beat up…and with his rapid healing time, no one would ever know…' "But Tsunade-sama, why would he not enjoy the festival? I mean, being able to hurt the being that caused his pain, that shouldn't hurt him… Right?" Tsunade gave her another 'look'. "Over the years, those two have gotten closer. So instead of a prisoner, guard type relationship, they acted more like fox and kit. The fox would push Naruto out of the body right before any assaults and the fox would take the hits and the pain. Then if Naruto needed comfort, the fox would provide it. Even when he was a child, he would often refer to the fox, not knowing that it was a fox, as the protector-warmth. Iruka also informed me that once or twice he called it his Mada. Because the gender of the fox is obviously a secret, taboo Naruto once told me, he called it a mix of Mama and Dada. Mada." A whistle pierced the air. Kakashi was at the door, "Come on!" he said almost urgently. Next thing they knew crystalline blue eyes were looking into Tsunade's. "How dare you talk about Kyuu- chan like I'm not here?"

Well, after a sound verbal thrashing, Naruto left and Tsunade was shocked at the protective nature that had taken root for the fox in Naruto. Who knew that he knew those words? Who knew he could comprehend those words? Who knew he could accurately use those words in a sentence? I didn't. Something tells me, the stupid Naruto that everyone thinks they know, never existed. But that wouldn't surprise me; Naruto has showed his intelligence on more than on occasion. Nothing could have prepared me, or the princess, for what would happen when she asked about him, _Sasuke._

Princess Koyuki made the biggest mistake in her life when she asked Naruto where Sasuke was. Blood leaked into the ocean. "Sasuke has prior arrangements that you have no business knowing or asking about. DON'T ASK ANYMORE." Naruto turned up his music and walked away. He was shaking in rage and was barely holding down the fire that _someone_ (Kyuubi) wanted to unleash on Koyuki. Her purple eyes widened at his outburst. The Naruto she thought she knew wasn't that boy. She turned in a flash and caught Sakura, "What the hell did Sasuke_ do _to him?!" Sakura gave her a solemn expression before saying, "He left. He joined Orochimaru, The evil sannin. The anniversary is tomorrow. Along with some other very stressful things for Naruto. Not only that but, Sasuke was with on the mission with you and something very endearing happened between those two in the land of waves. Its amazing Naruto hasn't just run off and blown up part of the forest or something. Part of Naruto just wants to go to sleep and forget any of this ever happened. I'm starting to wonder if that's not the best thing for him." Sakura's gaze turned to Naruto. He was fast asleep leaning against a tree.

"_All hell can't stop us now,_

_At last we shall have our revenge,_

_Vendetta, Vendetta! Vendetta!"_

Orochimaru was pacing up and down in the middle of camp while most of his minions were asleep. Well, Except Kabuto. He was just hoping that Orochimaru didn't kill him before he turned 18. That would not be in his best interest. No, dieing was not at the top of his to-do list.

"Orochimaru- san, you're going to hurt your self if you keep worrying like this…"

"I don't care! Sasuke cannot be so attached to Konoha! He asks if they know Naruto Uzumaki and if they answer yes he lets them go. This will not do! I can't get him to become my mindless killing machine if he still has that link. I mean he has been even more moody of the last couple days than usual! What am I going to do with him?!"

"Well you could send him to trail Naruto… I mean, I hear from a spy in the Rock Country that Team 7 is escorting the princess of snow to the country of snow. I know from experience that Naruto pushes the pain into him self. Sasuke will get the impression that Naruto doesn't miss him and hopefully he will cut off all ties to Naruto and Konoha."

"You know… That just might work…"

"That's my job, Orochimaru-sama."

"_Venom has some toxin for your twenty dollar bill,_

_Snake eyes is a ninja from the Yokahoma Hills,_

_Red eye to Miami!"_

We were about half way to Wave Country when Sakura let out a huge yawn. 'Oh no,' I turned my visible to her and said, "Come on Sakura, look at Naruto! He practically is half asleep and he's still walking faster than you!" She glared at me, "Naruto's also got enough Chakra to kill a horse. Remember that next time you compare him to some one, Kakashi- Sensei." "Be that as it may, you could still give a little more." I got no reply but a yelp and a stifled giggle from the princess. I looked back to see that Naruto had hoisted Sakura onto his back. "Well that's using your head, Naruto."

"_Like branches severed from the vine,_

_Like it was faulty by design."_

Sasuke was trailing his old team when Naruto placed Sakura on his back. 'Orochimaru has a sick sense a humor. Having me trail my own team? I hate him, but I need his power.' Sasuke watched as Sakura asked Naruto if she could listen to his music. He pulled the player out of his pocket and changed the music to the Anastasia sound track. I heard his say quietly, "Sasuke gave this to me. He said since I liked the movie so much that maybe it'd cheer me up." I smiled softly at that. Orochimaru could never convince me that he didn't care.

"_No one told me,_

_I going to find you,_

_Unexpected,_

_What you did to my Heart,_

_When I lost hope,_

_You were there to remind me,_

_This is the start."_

Sakura was pretty shocked at the fact that Sasuke gave anything to anyone, besides a scowl. But then again, Naruto had a way of worming his way into people's hearts. Just look at the princess! She had no emotions 'till Naruto when out of his way to care. "Naruto, you are perhaps the one thing that ties the world together." He smiled. Kakashi turned from the head of the group, "Now Sakura, no need to get mushy." Sakura stuck a tongue out at him. "I'll be mushy if I damn well please!" "Ah Sakura-chan, no need to get overly expressive." I went to hit Naruto when the princess said, "Oh Sakura, no need to get violent!" The whole group laughed, except me. I hate being the butt of their jokes.

"_They said, "I'll bet they'll never make it."_

_Just look at us going on_,

_We're still together,_

_Still going strong,_

_Still the one"_

They had traveled that whole way there. At some point, Koyuki had gotten a free ride on Kakashi's back, Sakura had fallen asleep, and Naruto's eyes had become blue again.

"Ahh! We are finally here!" Kakashi exclaimed as the princess got off his back. "Yeah, but you don't have a sleeping Koniochi on your back whose weight consist mostly of water and forehead." Kakashi started laughing until he was hit with a rock. Apparently, Sakura wasn't as asleep as we all thought. She went to hit Naruto and was blocked by a wall of chakra. "Not in the mood." Sakura immediately backed down. "Hey Naruto, I'm going to stay in town and draw attention away from you. Ja ne!" Kakashi was about to transport away when something jumped on Naruto. "NARUTO!!" He broke out into a smile. "Hey Inari! How's it going? Your mom okay?" He nodded vigorously. "Good." Naruto formed some seals, tapped him on the shoulder and poof. Inari was back at home. "What ever will I do with him?"

"I dunno but first why don't you guys go to bed? We have a long day tomorrow." Naruto started to roll out the mats as Sakura got the firewood ready. "Oi, Naruto. Lend me some well… Fire." A red stream of visible chakra ran over the ground toward the wood. It was set aflame while the chakra was still yards away. "OKAY! It's on fire!! NARUTO! CUT THE POWER!! NO ONE WANTS CHIKEN FRIED SAKURA!!" A barely restrained chuckle was heard and then echoed in the forest. Neither ninja thought anything of it. The chakra receded.

"_I'm the object of your affection,_

_You loved me still in my Imperfection,_

_The sun will shine,_

_Over winter snow,_

_And shadows fade,_

_In excelsis deo,"_

Sasuke silently walked into the camp. The glowing embers cast a soft glow on them all. He crouched down beside Naruto gently brushing his bangs away. "Do you know that I'm here? Can you sense me?" He sent a wistful look to the 4th mat that Naruto had rolled out. Sasuke knew it was just a habit to roll out 4 mats because normally because of Kakashi, But for now he could hope. Sasuke pulled the mat toward Naruto's and sat on it. The blond seemed tense. "Do you know how I've felt? Don't you know how I've hurt? At one point in time I thought I'd killed you. That almost killed me, too. Why did I leave?! I could have been just as powerful there. I could have been strong like you, but I ran away. I've seen how they treat you. If anyone was going to run to someone for vengeance, it should have been you. But no, you are too nice those villagers, yet they treat you like crap. I was an arrogant bastard that was constantly brooding or bitching about one thing or another, but no matter what, I was Konoha's golden boy. Why was I so stupid?!" Naruto flinched and recoiled when Sasuke raised his voice. The elder sighed and stroked Naruto's hair. He calmed immediately, such trust. "I'm going to just enjoy this. I'll probably never get this chance again." With that Sasuke layed down. He fell asleep soon after.

"_Someone you know,_

_Who's on your side,_

_Can set you free,_

_I can do that for you,_

_If you believe in me,_

_Why second guess,_

_What feels so right?_

_Just stay true your heart,_

_And you'll see the light."_

The next morning, Naruto had woken up at about 5:00 in the morning and immediately that something was wrong.

'Well, let's see,

Clothes Check.

Mat, Check.

Warm body to lay on, Check.

Wait…' (He'll comprehend in 3…2…1)

'AHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M LAYING ON SOMEONE!!!! Hmmm, A very strong someone.'

'**Ouch, Kit! What're trying to do? Deafen me?'**

'Maybe…'

'**Just open your eyes. I'm going back to sleep. mutter damn early bird. He didn't get that from Me.mutter'**

Naruto opened his eyes to find himself laying on, Sasuke Uchiha. He immediately pinched himself, many numerous times. "Sasuke?" He found himself whispering. "Sasuke, wake up!" Said Uchiha, opened groggy eyes to find Naruto staring at him. "Uh oh." Was all Sasuke got out before Naruto hugged him. "I missed you so much!" Sobs wracked through Naruto. Sasuke was really shell shocked at this point, but he got a rude awakening when Sakura breathing changed. She was going to wake up soon. "Naruto, in this life, Good things are but a dream, we'll meet again, some ware down the stream." He gave Naruto one last hug before standing up. "N-Naruto?" Naruto whirled around, there was Sakura sitting up, looking at him. "Am I seeing things? Or was Sasuke just here?" Naruto gave her a sunshine smile, "You're seeing things."

"_You're still the one I run to,_

_The one that I belong to,_

_Still the one I kiss good night…"_

Okay! Props for the newbie!

I survived the rage of Katsuki AND I wrote an awesome fic! I'm so proud!

I'd like to thank Shonen Jump for putting out Naruto. I'd like to thank Homeslice, My buddy, my friend, my pal. And I'd like to thank the musicians who originally wrote all those different songs!

Ladama: She's in a good mood…

Tati: It's kinda creepy…

Katsuki: Are you two nuts?! It's down right terrifying!

Isabella: What ever she's smoking, I want some..

Me: Hits Isabella I'M NOT SMOKING ANYTHING!

REVIEW ME!! Pouts… Pwetty Pwease?


	2. Chapter 2: Sasuke's delemmia

I'm so sorry that it took me so long to get this out… You see … Um…Well…

Ladama: She's just put this on the back burner…

Katsuki: December's a slow month for her…

Tati: And January too…

Isabella: Quit covering for her, She's just a slacker. Almost as bad as Shikamaru.

Procrastinator…

Isabella: is there a difference?

Um…

Uh…

I dunno…

Any who, this is the story.

Sasuke's Dilemma

The Dilemma

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental,

To reach out for another is to risk involvement,

To expose feelings is to risk rejection,

To place your dreams before a crowd is to risk ridicule,

To love is to risk not being loved in return,

To go forward in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure

But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. He may avoid suffering sorrow, but he cannot learn, feel, change, grow, or love. Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave. He has forfeited his freedom. Only a person who takes risks is truly free.

'He's hiding something from me… I know that I didn't imagine seeing Sasuke… Naruto has been acting peculiar.' Sakura looked on the grinning blond. It was almost like that one time. The day after the big battle with Haku and Zabuza. Kakashi told me the next morning went something like this…

Sasuke had just woken up and it was around 6 in the morning. Kakashi and Sakura were still asleep but Naruto was missing. Worried, though he'd never say it, he went looking for the blond. "Naruto?" He slowly made his way to the kitchen only to see the blond cooking a pan full of bacon and catching some toast. Sasuke leaned against the doorway and the blond perked up. Sasuke obviously thought something along the lines of 'He just noticed me? Some ninja he is.' Naruto placed the plate of toast on the table and guided the still half asleep Uchiha in front of the stove. He put the apron that he was wearing onto Sasuke and the placed the fork in Sasuke's hand. Naruto rubbed the sleep front his friends eyes and combed through his hair. "Take the bacon out when it's done and put it on this plate. When your done turn off the stove and put the plate on the table. Sakura will be in here in a moment. Take the credit; I have an Idiot's reputation to uphold!"

Sasuke yawned and mumbled out, "M-Kay." Naruto smiled at the tired boy. "Okay, I know you're not a morning person but it'll be worth it." Naruto got on his tiptoes and kissed Sasuke on the fore head. "Sometime I feel like ya'll s mother." Sasuke smiled and started pulling the bacon out of the pan. "You would never follow my instructions if you when fully awake." Sasuke yawned again, "Nope." Naruto laughed and walked to the door as Sasuke carried the bacon to the table with all the other food. When he turned around Sakura was in Naruto's place. "Sasuke-kun! You've out done yourself!" The now fully awake Sasuke turned back to see a bountiful buffet of breakfast food. Kakashi showed himself. "Yes, Sasuke, _You_ did such a good job. How did _you_ do it, Hmm?" Sasuke just glared with a look that clearly said, "If Naruto wanted her to know he would have said so."

Naruto walked into the room and yawned. He walked over, hugged Sasuke and picked up a plate. "Looks good." You know the bad thing? If Kakashi had never told me, I would've never known that Naruto fixed that and not Sasuke. I would have never cared. I was so blind. It was obvious that Sasuke was still asleep when I walked in but instead of asking about it, I just admired him more. Naruto would have never hugged Sasuke if he knew that he had been awake long enough to know what happened. Like he would have been, had he cooked that food. I'm so blind.

Naruto had put me on his back again and we were making good time, until both he and Kakashi froze up. "It seems we have Sound and Rock ninja surrounding us." Naruto nodded and I got off his back. "I can handle this. Sakura, princess, Hide. Kakashi, be my back up, though I don't think I'll need it."

**Fight scene!! Oh yeah! Beware… this is not my strong suit… I can't even write a good argument…**

A rasengan like sphere appeared around Naruto as he quoted a saying that Iruka told every one in class…

"Okay! Okay! Settle down, Children!" He frowned asSakura and Ino were once again fighting over Sasuke. "Oi, Naruto trade seats with Sakura and Shikamaru trade with Ino." The two girls glared at the two boys but as it was, Naruto and Shikamaru didn't like nor dislike Sasuke so they were safe by sitting by him. Sasuke gave Naruto a sideways glance before relocating his eyes to Iruka. "Okay, Today is an early out day so all I'm going to do is say a quote from one of the children in class. Ya'll are gonna try and figure out who it is. The only hint is it's a he and he wrote this as a way of verbally smacking Sasuke across the face and screaming, 'Get a hold of yourself.'" Iruka looked everyone in the eye before saying it.

" _This is our dilemma. All of us… _

Naruto called up the demon fox but right as she was about to attack when sudden Naruto began to laugh like a mad man. "What the-?" She started…

_To laugh is to risk appearing a fool…_

Naruto then started crying…

_To weep is to risk appearing sentimental…_

Sasuke saw Naruto problem and was about to help when suddenly he was hit with the same flash back as Sakura and Naruto.

_To reach out for another is to risk involvement,_

"I can't get caught… I c-care" Sasuke's voice stopped as he saw Naruto's eyes get real wide.

_To expose feelings is to risk rejection…_

" I can't be caught, I'm going to be" "What? Hokage?" The sound ninja laughed. "What Hokage gets caught in such a simple genjutsu?" The group of ninja laughed.

_To place your dreams before a crowd is to risk ridicule_

Naruto was hit in the gut and blacked out before he ever got a chance to fight. "Kit!" Kyuubi screamed but she disappeared before she could do anything.

(From now on, Italics is the battle)

"_Naruto!" The teammates yelled._

"To love is to risk not being loved in return.

"_You can't take him! You can't take both Naruto and Sasuke from me!"_

To go forth in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure."

_Four tails erupted from Naruto. "But risks…_

… Must be taken."

The young Sasuke's eyes widened as he saw Naruto curse and clench his fist. 'It was Naruto…' "Because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. He may avoid suffering sorrow, but he cannot learn, feel, change, grow, or love. Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave. He has forfeited his freedom. Only a person who takes risks is truly free." Iruka looked at every one before saying, "You have 5 minutes to figure it out."

Sasuke immediately raised his hand. "Sasuke? You already know?" He nodded. Iruka was in shock but said, " Sasuke, please guide the others to the answer." "Okay. Well first of all, If it's a student in this room, Iruka had to have gotten it after school. There are only a handful of people that hang out with Iruka after school. 4 to be exact. And 3 of them are female." By then the smarter half of class was staring at Naruto. " Now if you can't figure it out just by that, you're an idiot and have no right to become a shinobi. Now if He truly wants to tell the call he can tell them but I have no right to give out his name." Sasuke sat down and watched as Naruto silently thanked him. Kiba stood up. "ha! Pretty boy doesn't really know!" Sasuke was about to hurt Kiba when a soft touch on his back made Sasuke look at Naruto. "Tell them." He nodded. "The person who wrote it was Naruto Uzumaki. Oh, Naruto? I'm flattered you'd write something for me." A blue notebook was placed on his desk.

_Even with his power, Naruto was useless after his body gave out. _

"YOU! YOU'RE THE SLIMEY LITTLE SHIT THAT STOLE MY NOTEBOOK!!" Naruto looked in the notebook but nothing was gone and nothing was scribbled on. Just a few lines of kanji at the bottom of each page. "Their good, Naruto."

_Kakashi came back to find Sakura and the princess out of it and the unconscious body of Sasuke laying in the dirt. But Naruto was gone…_

"_Orochimaru got the kyuubi… All hell can't stop him now."_


	3. Chapter 3 : Masqurade

Whew, That took me along time to work up the courage to write… A lemon!!!

Tati: And I'm in this chapter! WOO WHOOO!!!

Isabella: She has seriously had too much caffeine…

Oh and before I forget, God bless all the lemon writers out there, For it is harder than it looks. That being said, Lets get on with it!

Katsuki: (She heard this somewhere) This fic is rated 7-up for lemony-lime goodness!

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When Sasuke woke up he found himself next to a sleeping Sakura. "Ah, Sasuke. I'm glad you're awake." The cold, bitter voice made Sasuke do a double take. It truly was … "Kakashi?!" The Junín sighed and said, "Sasuke, when I broke through the force field, I saw you, Sakura and the Princess, unconscious, on the ground and Naruto gone. Do you know what Orochimaru might do to him!?"

Sasuke's eyes widened. Ba-dum, Ba-dum, Rape, Ba-dum Ba-dum, Ba-dum Badum, Torture, Ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum, Ba-dum ba-dum ba-dum. Sasuke's breathing increased as something inside his head screamed, "Some Uchiha you are! You can't even protect your friends!" "…ke!" "…Suke!" Sasuke clutched his heart, "Sasuke!" Wide black eyes looked at Kakashi. "Don't pass out on me again! Listen, you can get back into that compound. If you try, maybe you can save him, Maybe its not to late." A yawn came from Sakura as she sat up. "Sasuke? SASUKE!!" She jumped on him but he soon turned into a log. "Sorry Sakura! I have to save my precious person!"

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The Snake was just receiving his prize, Naruto's perfectly sun-kissed form. "Were going to have fun…" (An: Insert evil laugh here.) He used that insanely long tongue to lick Naruto's cheek, But was instantly burnt by kyuubi. With a hiss he returned his tongue. Once again, Orochimaru created a 5 pronged seal onto Kyuubi's. Naruto's sky blue eyes opened in a loud scream.

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Sasuke was at the door when he heard Naruto's scream. He wanted to yell and rescue his friend but he had to keep cool and collected. Sasuke placed a sicko smirk on his face, even though inside he was grimacing. 'I can't do this on my own.' And with a prayer of safety he took a detour to the living quarters.

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Orochimaru forced Naruto onto a table, Locking him in. "let me go!" Naruto yelled as he tried in vain to keep Orochimaru from ridding him of his clothes. "Ha! Why would I let you go when I just got you?" He smirked and traced the spiral on Naruto's navel. "No! Stop!" Naruto's pleas fell on deaf ears.

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As Sasuke ran down the hall he ran into _just_ the 10-year-old Uchiha he was looking for. "Tati!" Sasuke stood there, Hunched over, panting and gasping. Tati just stared at him, "Uncle Sasuke?" The younger girl could read him like a book. "Why are you crying?" His eyes widened as he touched his cheek. Sure enough, Wet trails of his strong emotions criss-crossed his face. "Tati, My best friend is in Orochimaru's 'examination' room." Her tell-tale black eyes widened as her mouth formed an O. Tati watched her only uncle break down. "I have to save him, but I don't know how and he's going to get raped by Orochimaru. I can't get him out and I really need help." She thought for a second.

"I can bust him out. You need to keep his sane mind intact. If Orochimaru does it, you can't guarantee his safety. And Orochimaru won't stop without good reason… **but** if you were to convince him to let you do it…" Sasuke suddenly looked up at her, "What are you suggesting?" She sighed and pushed back her bangs. "I'm suggesting, you go and fake it. I'm sure he would understand that it was for his benefit, to save him, and forgive you." She walked to her uncle and hugged him. "As your best friend, you love him. If you truly gave him the choice between Orochimaru's rape and your love, I'll bet, He'd pick you in a heart beat."

Sasuke stood up and smiled slightly at her and said, "Thanks." He walked away with the sicko smile back in place. Sasuke was _back_ in **_Black_**.

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(An: Forgive me, for I know exactly what I do.)

Orochimaru licked him all over, scratched, bit, and fingered him until he had almost had enough. 'What is with him?!' Possibly the most frustrating thing was, 1, the boy wasn't hard, 2, He couldn't moan, and 3, he had cried the whole way through.

Deciding to torture the blond longer he replaced his finger and stretched him, hard. "Ah!! Stop! Please! Sasuke! HELP ME!!" 'No! I nee Sasuke to see you broken, not calling for his help!' In anger he cursed and fisted into Naruto until he bled. "Orochimaru-sama!" "What?!"

"Sasuke is here."

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I was nervous, I was scared. How was I going to pull off the act that I hated Naruto? And then rape him?! "Orochimaru-sama, you haven't stolen my prize have you?" He looked genuinely surprised, "What prize?" I smirked evilly, while trying to force down the need to barf. "I worked so hard to gain his trust, now I want to crush him. I want to take his innocence and spirit in one fail swoop." Oh gag me, tie me up, and mail me to Garra. "Oh brilliant, Sasuke-kun, you even had me fooled. What a good actor you've become! Come on." He led me to the room where my precious person laid bound by his hands and feet. Naruto was bruised here and there and had scratch marks on his legs. But possibly the most disturbing sight was the blood flowing from his entrance and chest. I smirked at Orochimaru before undoing his binds. Naruto immediately climbed into my lap and cried. I wrapped my arms around him. I whispered into his ear. "I'm going to save you. I can only stop Orochimaru if I do it. Naruto, I'm offering you my innocence, my virginity, in exchange for yours. I'll try to be gentle." I know his eyes widened by the chuckles behind me. He tucked his head under my chin. "I'm listening." "I need you to trust me. Can you cry on command?" "Yes." "Good. Everything I say from now on doesn't mean anything. Start crying if you understand." There was a wetness on my shoulder and Kabuto said," Oh, Sasuke-kun, be nice!!" I whispered, "I'm sorry." Before trailing my hand to his butt and started kneading. "You have to much trust in me. You're going to feel true betrayal." I slapped his ass before gently stretching him out of their view.

"I hate you."

_No, I don't._

"You're worthless."

_You're priceless._

"You're lower than dirt."

_I'm sorry._

"Demon."

_Angel_

"Monster."

_Saint_

"I hate you."

_I love you. You're my angel._

As he cried in my arms, I laughed cruelly, "Cry! Show how weak you are!" Please don't cry. Aishiteru, Naruto.

_And I die a little each time,_

_When he cries,_

I moved Naruto to lay on his back as I suckled on his nipple. I could tell he was hard. "Hmm, you like trash talk, such a Naughty boy." I love you. Orochimaru looked from over my shoulder. I got rougher; I bit down on his nipple and pulled hard on his other nipple. He cried out. Apparently he liked it a little rough. "You got him hard?" Orochimaru sounded amazed. I grabbed his member and Naruto moaned out, "I hate you too."

I began to rub my hands over his back while creating hickeys all over his neck.(1) "Are you ready?" I asked in a hushed whisper. The only answer I got was his legs opening for me, but I made it seem like I was forcing them open. He guided me into him. (2) I suddenly felt like kissing him but instead I held his arms above this head, and started roughly.

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Sasuke came to save me. He gave up his virginity to protect me. (3) The least I can do is let him enjoy it. I clenched and unclenched, because he moaned. I licked his chest, because he moaned. I followed his every command. I let him turn me over to doggy style me, because he moaned. "Un… Faster! Harder, Sasuke!" Did I say that? I guess I did. Wait! He's slowing down. "Ugh, Sasuke!!" He sat back and I was now on his lap. He tried different angles and I was trying my best to thrust back in the right direction. Suddenly, He hit something deep inside me and Stars broke loose. "Do that again!" He did, over and over until I came. He fell onto me. I smiled, Orochimaru had left. Sasuke whispered, "I like this mask better," before going unconscious. I pulled him close to me. Sasuke's face was calm and serene. No night mares, good. "Yes, this mask."

_Masquerade,_

_Paper faces on parade,_

_Masquerade,_

_Hide your face,_

_So the world will never find you._

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Ta da!!! I'm happy! I wrote this in 2 days! YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And now a episode from fruits basket.

Achoo! "Eat them, Kyo-kun! You'll feel better!"

"Like hell! I don't like leeks damnit!"

"But their good for you!"

" I DON'T GIVE THE RAT'S ASS!!!"

Yuki walks in.

"Hey, leave my ass out of it."


	4. Chapter 4: Jail break

Beware, authoress has really bad cramps right now. I am prone to bitchy spells.

Okay just so you know, Sasuke doesn't know that Tati or her younger siblings are Uchihas. He just thinks that 'Uncle' is a strange mannerism. He passed it off as a term of respect. (I hurt.)

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A shuffle. A squeak. A glance with sharingun eyes. Wait?! Sharingun!!??

In the pitch black of the room all that could be seen was two sets of sharingun eyes as they inched closer to the bed/table. One spread their chakra toward them and gently tried to pry the blond off the raven. He stirred. It tried to put him down but the damage was done. Naruto was awake.

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I awoke to the strange pulling of chakra on my body. It tried to pull me from Sasuke and that's probably what woke me up.

"Who's there?" I asked, wincing at the raspy-ness of my voice. Must've yelled quite a bit. I strained my eyes to see and sure enough in the corner there was a black figure. Most people wouldn't see it but I'm not like most people. "I see you there in the corner." It's eyes fluttered open in surprise. I shuddered at the blood red color, The Sharingun. Wait, I thought only Sasuke and Itachi have the Sharingun. Then I remembered that on a mission Sasuke could see in the dark when even I couldn't. I rushed to cover Sasuke's body with my own. It _laughed._ Or should I say _She_ laughed. It was obviously female. "I have four younger brothers and a father that doesn't know the meaning of modesty. There isn't anything that you've got that I haven't seen before." (Has anyone else gotten that speech before??) Suddenly Sasuke was pushed into my lap as a blanket was wrapped around us. I don't know what happened after that. I must have fallen asleep.

The next time I woke up it was because Sasuke had sat up. Distantly I heard water running. "Ohayoo, Naru-chan. Ohayoo, Tati-chan" I looked around for 'Tati-chan' and found her coming out of the bathroom. "Ohayoo, Uncle Sasuke. Ohayoo, Naruto-san." She smiled and again used her Chakra to life me into the air. I have to ask her how she dose that. I was yanked out of my thoughts when she dropped me into the tub. Ah, So _that's_ where the noise of running water came from. I didn't have much time to enjoy it as she scrubbed me down. Now I understand why Kiba complained so much about when his sister washed him! Women are ruthless! (Especially when they're PMS-ing, A fact Kyuubi teaches Naruto well. The pain.)

After about 15 minutes of hell, or scrubbing what ever you want to call it, She washed my hair. Not gently mind you. "Hey, Stop that! Don't pull my hair! Your supposed to be washing it. My skin's gonna be red for a week!" There was laughter. We both turned our heads to the door. Sasuke was _Laughing._ I've never seen Sasuke laugh. It was contagious. She started laughing and then I did too. Sasuke walked over to the bathtub losing his boxers right before getting in.(Droooooooooool) Tati handed me the scrub brush before leaving. I gently scrubbed Sasuke's back. "Hey, 'Suke, Why dose she call you Uncle? Is she Itachi's kid or something?" He shook his head. "I asked her the first time she called me Uncle. She said she wasn't his kid. It must be a mannerism, all her younger siblings call me uncle too. I never asked after that. You'll see who her father is, He's coming to bust you and them out of here." He seemed sad. "Suke, What's the matter?" He refused to look at me. "After this I'll never get to see you again." I hugged him. "Don't talk like that. It scares me." I kissed him on the back of the neck. "He sighed, "Next time I see you I might not remember this so I want you to know I love you." He turned and kissed me. That was the first time he kissed me. He thought obviously that it was also his last. I won't let that happen.

_Click Flash_

I pulled away, Sasuke didn't even have to turn around. "Sasuke! Hichi! Hachi! Get your Asses outa here!" The eldest smirked. He was a carbon copy of Sasuke, But you know how carbon copies are always on a different color of paper? Yeah like that. Where Sasuke's hair was blue tinted, this boy's hair was red tinted. I don't care what Sasuke said, these _were_ Itachi's kids. They reeked of the same over-abundance of chakra and skill, without the fake, you heard me right, _fake_, evil aura. The boy wore a white muscle shirt and long black jeans with a black belt and a silver clasp. The clasp had some sort of engravement on it but it was covered over with silver paste-like stuff so I couldn't tell what it was, but I bet it was a fan. _Uchiwa, the ceremonial fan of the Uchiha clan… _He was putting on golden bands that wrapped around his arms and ended with a ruby on each end. The little girl was wearing a blue dress with a large dark blue bow in the front, and the boy was wearing a traditional Chinese suit with blue fabric and dark blue trim. They must be twins. The younger boy bowed and said, "Forgive our brother, Sasuke is a little brash. He certainly lives up to his name. We call him Sake," The little girl giggled and said, "Cause he always seems to be drunk on his own hot air." A bright red blush covered the older boys face, "Don't tell them that!" Funny, For someone who looks just like Sasuke, He acts nothing like him. Sake, it really is the best name for him, gave me a smile, "Hello beautiful, What's your name?" It was my turn to blush, how he went from a dork to a Casanova in a split second, I may never know. "N-Naruto U-Uzumaki." **Great, nice one kit. You're a total loser. **"I'd get lost in that whirlpool any day." _Uzumaki means whirlpool, but how did he know that? _Suddenly a remix of total eclipse of the heart started playing in the other room. Hachi sighed, "Tati and her music." The little girl nodded with Sake. "Yeah, Nee-chan does like music a lot." Suddenly, it was turned to Malchik gay by Tatu. "KEEP MY MUSIC ON!!" "Aww, but Mom…" "No Buts. EVERY ONE OUT HERE TO BE COUNTED!!" Sasuke stood up and pulled me to him. A shiver went down my spine. His eyes are enchanting, That or I'm cold and 2 inches from pressing my hips to his. Neither is false, and number 2 is true. Very true. Hichi left and her voice rang out. "BOTH OF YA'LL SHUT UP AND PUT IN MY MUSIC!!!" "O-okay, Hichi-san." Man-eater by Nellie started playing. A slender arm grabbed Hachi by the scruff of the neck and pulled him out, and he in turn latched onto Sake and he just flailed searching for something to hold onto. Man-eater, make you work hard, make you spend more, make you want more, overlord. Yikes. Sasuke pushed our hips together and kissed me. All other thoughts left my head. He pinned my hands above my head and the edge of the bath forced my knees out. Without Sasuke I would have lost my balance and fell. Not that I care right now, I'm getting a hickey. Mr. Lonely, huh? Not anymore, Koi. I screamed, Was kyuubi's seal always that sensitive? Judging from the laughter in the back of my head, I would assume not. Or was that evil chuckling coming from in front of me? Sasuke sure was doing his fair share of it.

"FREE PORN!!!"

Sasuke flung a shuriken at the door right next to Sake's head(Still don't know where he got that.). "Next one won't miss." The door closed. "Nope, their busy." He let out a dark chuckle as he layed me down on the floor of the bathtub. I propped up on my elbows as he settled between my legs. No! I don't want Sasuke to do that to me. He shouldn't have to. 1,2 step, Very cool. "Sasuke, Don't… Stop…" He grinned at me. "Don't stop? Didn't plan to." No, He didn't understand. "No, Sasuke! Stop!" He froze and then got off like he had just been burnt. Fear, He's afraid he hurt me. **Cute, kit. He really does care. **" Naruto? Are you… okay? I didn't …force you or anything…Did I?" I sat up and pushed him on his back, "No, I just don't want you to do that. It's disgraceful. I'm Uke, I'll give head." 'Kyuubi, how do I give head?' Distantly there is the sound of a skull hitting the wall. **You don't know this? Ah well, um…stick it… in your mouth and…keep putting it down until… your nose is in the fuzzy, blue black …thing… there. Are you sure you don't know or are you just trying to embarrass me? **'Is it working?'** yes. **'I guess I don't know then.'** Bastard. **I followed her directions and it was working well. If Sasuke's hand in my hair were any indication. **FREE PORN!!!** **Uh, Now err, Squeeze His balls and scrape… it… with your teeth. **You don't like the word dick do you? **Nope. **You know, Eating ramen at a inhuman speed without chewing has it's perks. "Naruto, I wish you wouldn't talk to Kyuubi while doing me. It makes me feel …well you know." I never thought I'd ever see Sasuke Uchiha pout. He kissed me and a hand trailed its way down when… "Ehem, As absolutely tempting as Popcorn and a lawn chair is right now, ya'll are needed out here." The woman had long blond hair with red highlights and laughing blue eyes. Her brown cloak covered everything else.

"Alright, alright. Katsuki, We're coming." She grinned, evilly, "In more ways than one, I see." I blushed. "Hey, Neon, Aren't you Arashi's kid?" I nodded. "Well his wife, your mother, Was my sister. My nephew, Naruto. Nice to finally meet you, My name is Katsuki Aurutsu of the sand. Sasuke, Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo, Him." Does she really think I wouldn't catch that!?! My aunt…**Is a pervert.**

_Be my Bad Boy,_

_Be my man,_

_Be my weekend lover,_

_But don't be my friend,_

_You can be my Bad boy,_

_But understand,_

_That I don't need you in my life again,_

_No I don't need you in my life again._

Itachi and Kisame slowly made their way to the sound village hideaway, "Hey Itachi, I love your kids and all but why are we going to get them? I swear, They were safer there!" Said Uchiha turned to Kisame. "I'm going because My wife, The one I killed a whole clan for, asked me to come get her. Are you going to challenge my authority?" Sushi-chan gulped and shook his head. "I didn't think so." (I just love calling Kisame, Sushi-chan.)

_Once upon a time I was falling in love,_

_But now I'm only falling apart,_

_Nothing I can say,_

_A total eclipse of the heart._

I never knew just how many children Katsuki had until they were all lined up. Kami, That's a lotta kids! There was Tati in her normal black shirt, Necklace with that HUGE crystal, Pouch full of other Crystals, pants covered in patches. She had Swirls embroidered in the flares, a patch that looked like Sake's gold bands, two wavy lines by the pockets with dots by them, The same pattern just rolled up on her left back pocket, nothing on the right though, A flower like her younger brother Touya on the back of her right knee, a angel with black wings on the right upper thigh, and a yin-yang symbol on the left. Now that I think about it, there's on for me too, the three tomoe of the Sharingun for me. But She wouldn't tell my why she had the mangaku (SP?) sign on the other leg, Hmmm?

Sake was wearing his normal outfit with a long black Chouran, Hichi and Hachi were wearing similar red Chinese formal outfits but Hichi had her shirt tails much longer than Hachi's in a skirt-like fashion. The younger children went like this. Kiki, a brilliant strategist with an IQ far above mine, The hard part is getting her to use it. She wore a frilly black dress and little black ballerina shoes, she was 8. Imaye, truly the most levelheaded person on the planet, you ruffle this girl and there will be hell to pay, She wore a blue version of Hichi's dress, she was 7. Katsuya, The only one in the pack with blonde hair, this six year old was the runt of the group, but what he lacked in skill, he made up for in enthusiasm, he wore a red shirt and black pants, he was 5. Ujji was Kiki's twin brother, this dynamo had a knack for teaching, he taught me a Jutsu even Kabuto couldn't get across, He idolized Sake and therefore wore a mirror image of his clothing and like his sister, he was 8. Touya was the most effeminate dude out there but he knew how to take command. Despite his girly looks none of the others dared to cross him, He could make you pee your pants. He wore a brown Yukata like I did, he was Imaye's twin brother making him 7. 9 kids, and SHE'S PREGNAT!!!!

JAILBREAK

"Hi! My name's Naruto." A girl looked at me from the group and coolly said, "We know." Weird, since when do girls wear Yukatas? "And your name is?" She looked at me with a raised eyebrow before saying, "Touya." Wait. WTF?!? Touya's a boy's name!!! OH MY GOD. THAT'S A BOY??!!?? SERIOUSLY!! HE PUT HAKU TO SHAME.

"Are we ready to go?" A male voice said. I sounded suspiciously like Itachi, but it was dismembered. I couldn't find him. Sasuke kissed my cheek before going inside to distract anyone coming to check. It had to be him. "Naruto-kun, your coming with me. Katsuki, darling, You take the children to Konoha. The Uchiha district is yours." Itachi and Kisame stepped out of the shadows. "Are you going to take me to Akatsuki?" He cracked a rare smile. "I'm on vacation for a week. Kisame and I are going to train you."

JAILBREAKJAILBREAKJAILBREAK

REVOLT I SAY!! ALL YOU SASUNARU FANS MUST REVOLT WITH ME!!! Has Anyone seen Konohamaru's second transformation in chapter 347?!?! It's disgusting!! Man, I saw that and started to heave. Thinking about it makes me wanna barf.

WE MUST REVOLT WITH A LOTTA KONHAMARU BASHING SASUNARU FICS!!! ARE YOU WITH ME?!?!

Oh and a Shout out to Ty, cause I said I would.

(What did I tell you bout bitchy spells?)


	5. Chapter 5: Mondays Suck

Hello! Hey I'm sorry that the last chapter was so bad, but I'm too lazy to fix it. I'm a procrastinating bitch that has to force herself to quit reading fanfiction and get back to writing. There, see? I'm out with it! And yes Mondays Suck, and every other day that ends in y. (See? I loved that fic!)

So anyway, I'm gonna send out more props! To the 9 people who have replied so far, Go you! Man, ya'll are awesome, I LOOOVE feedback. If any of you have any idea's as to the filler chapters to come, (I have to wait until Sasuke gets his act together in the Manga. I might start after it later but right now? TO THE FIC MOBILE!!)

Oh and Naruto got there Sunday evening and they left Monday morning.

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"Are we there yet?" "No."

"Are we there Yet?" "No."

"How 'bout now? "No."

"…"

"…"

"Kisame! Are we there _yet?_" "NO!!!!"

Uchiha Itachi had listened to the previous phrases for the last 6 hours making it about noon, Never had bedtime seemed so far away. The poor dude had a migraine, a twitch, and a popped blood vessel, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" "Itachi-nii, Your twitching." "Thank you, Captain obvious." Naruto pouted, feigning hurt, He was even crying! "That was so mean, Itachi-nii." Kisame hugged the boy, rubbing it farther in Itachi's face, "Don't worry, Kitsune-chan, I still love you." "Aww, I love you too, Sushi-chan." Kisame blinked and then his face contorted in good-natured anger, "NARUTO!!!!" Itachi sighed, This was gonna be a looooong day…

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Naruto stared in wonder as the walked into a large building, Inside was dimly lit and terribly cold. Naruto huddled farther into Itachi's arms, "Tachi-nii, It's really cold. "He frowned, "Sorry, I'll warm you up." The blond gasped as he was suddenly warmed from his head to his feet by an unseen force. "What is that?" "The Katon, or fire element. My mother was always cold, no one knew why but when it would get really bad one of us, My father, Sasuke, or I, would use this to warm her up. It's not that hard but very tedious to learn." Naruto nodded, Blue eye peeking out from the cloth, as he let the heat warm him.

Kisame walked beside the Uchiha and his precious cargo. "What do you think Sasuke would say if he saw you holding Naruto like that?" Itachi looked at the sleeping, or nearly sleeping, blonds nestled in his arms. "Get your hands off my uke. Don't touch my dobe, or inevitably, Get the fuck away from him, I'm going to kill you now." A small chuckle rose from the bundle along with Kisame's own. "When will he realize that the way the Uchiha's treated their children was wrong, totally wrong." Itachi stayed silent, Sasuke would never know. He will never tell him, he loved his brother to much to force him into making a judgment over what was right, and what was wrong, the situation was just to hard to sort through. "Never mind." Kisame stated, noticing the Uchiha's sudden silence. But he couldn't help but wonder, how would the tides turn if Sasuke were to know the truth?

_A 14 year old Itachi ran through the thick woods, "Yes! Almost to Suna!" He whooped in joy, as his Anbu squad leader looked at him strangely. "Itachi I know you're excited but calm-""How can I be calm when the love of my life is waiting in Suna? I haven't seen Katsuki in 5 months!" Itachi rushed forward as his squad sighed again. The only one who could get Itachi like this was Katsuki Aurutsu, The Heiress to the Aurustu throne and blood-line trait. The advanced Copiers, these people only needed DNA and a Chakra sample and they could, within a week, copy your keke genkai. Their body literally became surrogates for a foreign life form, It was amazing, but dangerous. For it would soon it would consume them and they would die. That was the reason that only two had survived, Katsuki and her deceased sister Ayame, who died in birth. Ayame was the Yondaime's wife and the mother of the Kyuubi-boy, Naruto Uzumaki. _

_In response to this information Itachi had stopped to help the young boy as much as possible, for with his Sharingun he could clearly see the difference between him and the kyuubi, Just like most Uchiha. And again, just like them, He didn't blame Naruto. He often invited Naruto into his home, and He and Sasuke had become friends. Itachi smiled at this thought. Every time he brought Naruto home, Itachi would call out, 'We're home!' And Sasuke would come running. The only time he ever announced that he was home, was when Naruto was there with him._

_Sasuke adores Naruto so, He would always hug him and check him over for bruises, scratches, or any other form of injury, like a concerned lover or worried best friend might. Sasuke never would find one because when Itachi noticed that Naruto was hurt he took the long way home, so that Kyuubi would heal the boy before Sasuke saw him. Naruto never came to the house without Itachi except for that one time…_

Itachi visibly shuddered and clutched Naruto closer to himself, afraid if he got too loose, Naruto would appear like _that_ again.

_A 6 year old Naruto knocked on the gates of the Uchiha district for he hadn't the energy to open them himself, A curious old woman looked through the door, her expression quickly changed into one of horror. 'They went too far." She pushed the gates open farther and gazed upon the body of one Naruto Uzumaki. His face was bruised and torn, like someone had been wearing brass knuckles, or jewelry. Both eyes were black and he had a busted lip. His shirt was ripped showing things ranging from small cuts to huge gashes to precise bruises, _hickeys?No, they wouldn't…would they? _The old woman hadn't the time to think as the boy toppled over. She caught him, "Who, Naruto? Who should I take you to?" and with his last coherent breath, he answered, "Sasuke." So she ran. She ran through the pouring rain, the puddles, the mud, all the way to the house of one Fugetsu Uchiha. Auntie desperately banged on the door, "HELP! ITACHI-SAMA!! SASUKE-CHAN!!" Sasuke answered the door and gasped, "N-Naruto? Naru-chan? Naru-chan wake up!!" Sasuke wiped the tears from his eyes as he sucked in a deep breath and bellowed out, "ANIKI!!!!" _

_When Itachi reached the door he was panting and half dressed, Katsuki was in Konoha, Put it together. "Oh…my…God. What happened… to him?" Auntie huffed, Tired from running, "I don't know, he knocked on the gates and passed out." Itachi gently took the boy from her arms, as Katsuki walked down the stairs wearing a long black skirt and Itachi's black button up shirt. She gasped, "Naruto! Itachi, why does he have hi-" "Shh, love, Sasuke's worried enough."_

_Sasuke was pacing back and forth, Anxiously looking up to try and see into Itachi's arms, "Why is Naruto hurt? Aniki, what's wrong with him? Aniki" Sasuke franticly searched Itachi's saddened eyes for some form of explanation, but could find none. Sasuke sat down on the armchair and looked expectantly at Itachi. "What?" He held his arms out, "Can I hold Naru-chan?" "Yes, but be careful." Itachi placed Naruto into Sasuke's arms as Katsuki held onto him for dear life, Maternal instincts on overload. "Naru-chan, wake up… Naru-chan, I'm sorry I wasn't there, I went home and didn't walk you home first, I'm sorry. So sorry, Naru-chan…" Fat tears dripped off the petite ravens face as he rocked Naruto back and forth, calling his name like a mantra, "N-Naru-chan!!" _

_All Itachi could do was watch his little brother break down into sobs, Katsuki hugged him, "I'm glad Naruto's not awake, in his hour of need, he doesn't need to see Sasuke fall apart." Itachi nodded, agreeing. The old woman at the entrance cleared her through, not wanting to deal with the mushy crap they'd been spewing. "Auntie, I'll show you out." He led the elderly woman to the door. He stood there staring at the door before a light touch on the shoulder made his look at Katsuki. She pointed at the boys with a shushing gesture. Sasuke had stopped apologizing for the world and had started to try and wake Naruto up. He held his hand, rubbed uninjured parts of his arm and whispered his name, trying to get Naruto to come to. Sasuke sighed and kissed Naruto's forehead, like Itachi did to wake him up in the morning, Mom and dad didn't get out of bed till 6 and that was too late to go to the academy, So Itachi woke him up at 4:30 every morning so that he would make it to class on time._

_Sasuke felt Naruto stir and wrinkle his eyebrows so Sasuke kissed his nose and cheeks, Naruto opened his eyes, "Naru-chan! You're awake! "Katsuki ran to Their side as Itachi soon followed. "Sasuke, Ugn, I hurt every ware… Why were you kissing me?" Sasuke answered with a relieved grin, "Because that's all you would respond to." He nuzzled Naruto's hair. Itachi cracked a toothy grin when he saw he blond hug Sasuke, Katsuki would place bets later, it was guaranteed. "Well, now that you're alive again, we can get back to where we left off." She pulled Itachi away by his wrist, "Come on Ita-kun." She giggled._

_Naruto shakily sat up. "Why do I hurt so bad?" Sasuke frowned, "I don't know, did you forget the bad again?" Naruto nodded and layed back down on Sasuke's chest, "I'm sorry, Sasu-kun. I didn't mean to, Mada made me. She said it's for the best." Sasuke frowned deeper, somewhat confused, _Mada?

Itachi layed the sleeping blond his bed, and prepared to sleep as well, No matter how awesome he was, 2 hours of rest did things to you. (I know from experience. Like tomorrow after writing all of this in one day I'm gonna be so tired.)'Since he already knows the Rasengan, I can work with that, maybe Kyuubi will have some ideas…'

MondaysSuckMondaysSuckMondaysSuck

Mondays truly do suck. I stayed up till, like 1:00 in the morning doing this, and I didn't even get off track! Honest! So make sure to send me reviews! Lots and lots of reviews! Muhahahaha!!!

Ladama: Dang, She should never drink that much coffee. Ever.

Tati: True dat.

Katsuki: Ditto.

Isabella: But damn! Look at how her fingers just speed up when she drinks 5 pots of coffee!!!

Tati: You mean the coffee she shared with you?

Isabella: Yeah…. Drool Yummy, yummy coffee. Me love coffee so much…

Me: And Diet Coke! LOTS OF DIET COKE!!!

Tati: And techno music! Lots of techno music! Mainly Boom Boom Boom Boom by the vengaboys

Ladama: (Whispering to Katsuki) She couldn't sleep if she wanted to… Her bladder is not gonna let her.

Katsuki: Oh trust me, you would be surprised.

Ladama: 0o

Tati!$#&

Isabella: WTF?

Me: Cracks knuckles YOU SHALL DIE!!!!!!!!!!

Katsuki: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!

Tati: But first, review. She won't hurt you if you review.

Oh and Naruto is based off of medieval Japan and there they married girls when they started their periods, and guys when they started getting erections. Katsuki is 2 years older than Itachi, but she didn't have pressure from her parents (Their dead.), And the Uchiha's didn't care if Itachi got married, because they didn't want him attached. Ayame was 25 when she died. Major leap there, but yondaime was probably around 27 when he died, it made sense.


	6. Chapter 6: Tuesday's are worse

Hello All! MORE TECHNO!!!!! Whooooaaaaa! Whoooaaaa! WHooooooaaaaa! Whoooaaa! Vengaboys are back in town!!!

Yeah so, I got NO reviews and I'm sad. So in protest I shall write more!!

Ladama: That's just her way of saying that she has an hour of free time left and she's bored and will probably be awake again at 5:00.

Tati: Yeah, dude, She slept ALL day, She was really sick.

Isabella: I've got a coffee hangover….

Katsuki: Snore…

Ladama: She's still sleeping off the Diet coke. I told her she shouldn't have had a drinking contest with Musica.

Isabella/Tati/Me: Silently Agreeing…

Me: Ah well, Back to work.

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"Hey! I think he's coming to!"

A sound nin poked the rousing Uchiha, "Hey, dude, you okay?"

Sasuke rubbed his throbbing head, He had been found out and severely beaten for helping… Who? Who did I help? "What happened?" "Dude, you pulled a no-no, and helped a prisoner escape Punishment and the Ward! You're lucky you aren't dead! Orochimaru wasn't happy."

Oh, him, Orochimaru's such a pest. God, I wish he would just leave me alone. "Who? I don't remember, Who was it I helped? Why would I help anyone?" The sound nin laughed, "My thoughts exactly! I don't know who you helped though. I know it was a guy and He had Blond hair. But that's it." Naruto? Why was he here? And what could the Dobe have done to get Punishment? Normally Orochimaru just through them in cells. "I don't know anyone like that…" He waggled his eyebrows, "From what I heard, ya'll were _very_ familiar…" I choked, Nope, never. I would NEVER pull that, ew dude, I'm straight. VERY straight. The boy just shrugged, "I heard you two used to be best friends and so you saved him, He was gonna get laid anyhow. By you or Orochimaru, so in a way you saved him all sorts of trauma." Ah, that makes more sense, I faked it! "Hn."

Sasuke stood up and walked into his room and took a long hot shower, never noticing the hickey on the side of his neck. "It never happened, the freak made it up." That's it. It's all just a story! And with that he drifted to sleep, letting the water wash away his worries.

_Just a story_

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"Is it alive?"

"It won't be once Itachi wakes up…"

"Maybe we should save it, Yeah?"

"Maybe…."

"And I could keep it as a pet, Yeah?"

"That is sick Deidara"

"I could make it into a puppet… It would make a nice puppet…"

"That's sick_er_ Sasori."

"Well you don't seem to be giving out any good ideas, Tobi."

Naruto stirred at the unfamiliar voices, opening one eye to half mast. He was greeted with the sight of a fingerprint mask. "Oh, Hey! He lives!" Only to have the intruder pulled back by a blond with a freaky Hairdo. "Give it some space, Yeah?" A red haired individual beside them scowled, "We should stop referring to it as an 'It'." Tobi nodded, "Yeah, so, what's..." He lifted the covers slightly, "His name?" Naruto blushed heavily and then noticed he was still in his boxers and Black T-shirt. "I'm assuming only guys wear boxers? Unless there something you'd like to inform us off?" "No, I'm a dude." "And you're name is…?" Naruto just looked at Sasori like he'd grown another head. Deidara added this tidbit, "Te amo es…Yeah?"Oo?? Naruto was about to say something when he was hugged from behind, and pulled toward Itachi, "Ya'll are so loud." He mumbled into Naruto's hair, causing another blush. "Aww, Cute, Yeah?" Deidara giggled. Sasori groaned, "I was hoping to play with him more, but now he's gonna die!" Naruto chuckled, "Why would my uncle kill me?" That caused a group double take.

"Uncle?" They said in unison, Deidara was so freaked that he even dropped the 'Yeah'. "Yeah, Uncle. Piss off, guys I'm tired." They all slowly backed out of the room…

Kisame, sat up from the other side off Itachi, "What was that all about?" Itachi preceded to let go of Naruto and cuddle up to his pillow instead. "No idea. Go back to sleep, I'm wiped." "Me too." Kisame layed back down, back facing Itachi. Naruto got out from under the blanket, which he could now tell was Itachi's cloak, and left to find something to eat. When he walked outside, it was once again icy cold, "Now I know why they always wear those cloaks." "We'd freeze without them, Yeah?" Deidara was sitting on the ground clutching his heart, panting like he'd just run a marathon. "I thought I was gonna die, Yeah? But you'll protect me from scary Itachi-sama, Yeah?" Naruto laughed and helped his fellow blond up.

"Yeah, I'll protect you." Deidara smiled and glomped the poor boy. "Hey, were can I get one of those cloaks? It's cold, man." "I can give you one of my spares, Yeah?" Naruto grinned and nodded, He liked Deidara, I mean, he _seemed_ friendly enough… Dei led him down the hall and into another room, this one was covered in various art pieces and sculptures. "This is my room, Yeah? I'll go get you a cloak now, Yeah?" It was once again warm in the man's room, apparently the members kept their rooms warm so they didn't have to wear their cloaks. He came out with a cloak, a hat and a box. "Here. You can have these, Yeah?" Dei opened the box and showed off different rings, He pulled out a canary yellow one that said Fox. "Honorary member, yeah?" They both laughed, but Naruto put on the ring anyhow. "Sakura-chan is going to flip if she sees me like this." Dei smiled, "All the more reason to wear it, Yeah? That pink-haired girl needs a scare, yeah?" Naruto laughed heartily before realizing that Deidara knew who he was. "Wait, what?" Now he was scared, If they knew he was Naruto, then wouldn't they try to hurt him? "You're not my fetch, yeah? So I don't gotta do anything, you're Itachi's and Kisame's and they aren't gonna do anything to you, Yeah?" Naruto felt like there was a weight lifted off his shoulders, they weren't trying for him, he was technically as safe here as he was in Konoha, or safer. They wouldn't try to kill him for his biju, at least not yet. He wasn't their target.

Dei stood up walked to the door, "You're coming, yeah?" Naruto shook himself out of the revere and put of the cloak, but simply held the hat. "Hungry, Yeah?" Naruto nodded. "Me too, Yeah?" Dei grabbed his hand and pulled him down the hall.

"AHHHHHHHH!!! EWW, WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT DEIDARA??" (See? This is why you never hold hands with Dei.)

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"Okay Naruto, let me talk to Kyuubi." Naruto eyed him suspiciously but handed over control. **"What do you want, Uchiha?" ** Itachi rolled his eyes, "I want to teach him a capturing technique to use against my brother but I don't know one for Chidori. Any ideas?" She pondered and said simply, **"Rasengan. Trap it in a rasengan and force it back in his face." **"That just might work! Thanks, Kyuu." **"You're welcome."** Naruto regained control just when Itachi called up a raikiri, Scaring the hell out of him. "Why are you using Kaka-sensei's technique?" Itachi smirked, "Because you're going to learn how to capture it. Can you compress the rasengan with one hand?" He nodded, "Then you are going to simply wait to compress it after the Chidori has already punctured the sphere. It may be difficult to do but you can take Sasuke's chakra and use it against him. Up to the challenge?" Naruto grinned and just like Itachi, undid the top snaps of his cloak, "Al ways."

And thus the training began. Itachi was surprised that after 2 shots Naruto had mastered it. "Yatta!! I did it! So what do I do after I have the chakra?" Itachi simply stood up and kicked thin air, "You will kick him square in the chest and dispose of the Nagari Boshi as soon as possible. That can and will kill anything in a 50 foot radius." Naruto nodded, he would have to get rid of it before it killed them both, So how would he do that? "You will concentrate Chakra in your arm and release it when you strike, Much like Tsunade does, and blow it across the world. Well maybe not that far." Itachi pointed to a tree, "Try it." Naruto walked over and Concentrated. But like the water-walking exercise, he just couldn't get the knack of it.

"Naruto, the seal." He raised his shirt, Naruto knew full well that Itachi had copied the release from Jiraiya, "Shh, What he dosen't know can't hurt him." And then he hit Naruto in the stomach. Naruto had the wind knocked out of him but got up anyway. He tried it again, the Tree turned to rubble. "Good. Use that ability to punch the Nagari boshi out of range. Don't use it too often though, you'll get used to it and do it all the time."

Naruto cocked his head to the side, "Why is that a bad thing?" Itachi sighed, "Because Sakura Haruno is training under Tsunade, is you just go back and blow something away, She won't feel as special because she has to train hard to do that. You have you're mother's natural ability to pick up techniques quickly." Naruto nodded his head in realization, "Okay, that would be kinda mean." "That's what I thought." Naruto nodded and pointed to the setting sun. "We should go back soon." Itachi picked up his cloak and hat before following Naruto back inside.

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Okay yeah, I really havn't got anything witty or mean to say so yeah.

Ladama: Oh my god, it's the Apocalypse!

Tati: -Faints-

Katsuki: -Runs around like a chicken with its head cut off- We're all gonna die!!!

Me: -hits them all on the head- Idiots.

Ladama: What was that for?

Katsuki: Yeah ditto!

Tati: -snore-

Me: You're all morons.

Ladama: That's why you love us.

Me: -sigh- Just review…


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